1. Boudoir photography is all about showing sexy women in lingerie or naked.
Wrong! Boudoir is a French term, which refers to a woman’s private room where she can have all the time for herself. This type of photography is all about being intimate, cozy and sensual, but you don’t need to pose in sexy lingerie to feel that. Everything that can waken up your senses is very welcome – your favorite soft sweater with a pair of woolen high socks can be a perfect solution. It’s not all about showing your skin, but of course it can be a part of it – you decide.
Above a photo of myself I took long before I knew I would ever live in Berlin and start boudoir photography. Yet I craved this atmosphere of calmness, intimacy and femininity. Photos on which women are powerful and strong yet delicate. This fake fur I bought on discount became a perfect excuse to try it out.
2. You get boudoir photos as a gift for your partner.
Boudoir in my opinion is all about feeling comfortable in your own body, owning your body image and your sexuality. It’s not about being sexy for someone else, it’s about showing yourself that you care about the one and only body you have. I know that you can find boudoir photos focused on pleasuring the viewer on the internet: women perking up their breasts or sticking out their butts towards the camera. But it shouldn’t be a “who’s the sexiest” contest.
There’s a saying beauty is in the eye of the beholder and as much as I agree with it, we tend to put ourselves in the place of the beauty not the beholder. True magic happens when you position yourself as the beholder – you’re the judge of who and what is beautiful. You don’t need to expose yourself and wait for the judgement of others to know if you pass the beauty test or not, you can simply put yourself out there claiming “I’m beautiful.” Of course there might be people who disagree, but isn’t it the wonderful part of this diverse world? You may think roses are the most beautiful flowers, but someone will find them too cliche – and we don’t get upset about that. You are beautiful and you can decide to share your beauty with the world through boudoir photos if you wish so.
3. You need a total visual makeover before a boudoir shoot.
Marilyn Monroe once said “A smile is the best make-up any girl can wear” – I can’t agree more with that. In my opinion boudoir photos should make you feel at ease, happy and cheerful. I know that there are some photographers who offer hair styling and make-up services, and it’s completely fine if that’s what you’re looking for. But I want to show an alternative and remind women it’s an option not a necessity. Of course you can look amazing after a whole staff took care of your looks, but I want to show you that you don’t need all of that to feel and actually be pretty. Just come the way you are every day. You can wear make-up and style your hair, if you feel like it. But you can also stay as natural as you want. Just wear a smile and it will be fabulous.
4. Boudoir photos are only for young and slim women.
Biggest mistake you can make! There are no limits to what is beautiful, but unfortunately we were raised in a culture that decided there are certain boundaries. You need a firm, flawless skin, perky breasts, round butt, big eyes, small nose, long legs – you know, the Barbie type. But let me tell you – of all the wonderful women I photographed not a single one felt she has passed the “beauty test” from the start. And they came from all different countries, ethnicities, shapes and ages! When you’re white you want to get tanned, when you’re brown you want to avoid sun and not get any darker. All these laws of beauty are so contradictory simply because they’re straight up bullshit installed in us to make us feel smaller and less powerful.
We’re beautiful at every size, every stage of our life. And I’m on a mission with Berlin Boudoir to show that to all the people around. Stretchmarks, wrinkles, saggy skin, round belly – they deserve our love, they show the way our bodies went with us through life. Why would we be ashamed of them – they’re the witnesses of our resilience and strength. Show them with pride.
5. You need to know how to pose/have experience in front of camera.
Absolutely not! In my photo shoot I will never ask you to strike a pose that feels uncomfortable, so you don’t need to have special posing skills.
When I first started Berlin Boudoir I asked my boyfriend to come and help me try out poses I found online. Oh my, how surprised I was to discover that some of them, which seemed easy, turned out to be really hard! I knew I never want to turn my models into a robot when I’m instructing them to move every body part separately. You should feel comfortable at all times during the photo shoot – that’s my main goal. If you feel good, you’ll look good as well.